Headlines about the pandemic’s impact on youth mental health have left many parents worried about their children and unsure of what they can do to help them.

Now, as restrictions are relaxed – and school, home and social life return to something that looks like normal – young people must make significant adjustments as they face new pressures.

Parents need clear, evidence-based, practical strategies to support their adolescent’s mental health. But it can be hard to find.

Read more: Treating a child’s mental illness sometimes means getting the whole family involved

To fill this gap, our as yet unpublished study asked 35 international experts (researchers, health professionals and parent advocates) what parents can do to support their teen’s mental health during the pandemic.

Here are their nine key tips:

1. Parents, take care of yourself

While a parent’s natural instinct is to care about their children (and perhaps aging parents), taking care of your own needs will put you in a better position to support those you care about.

2. Keep the conversation open

Ever-changing local regulations and restrictions, along with reopening rules, can make teens more anxious.

Help your teen feel more in control by providing clear, up-to-date, age-appropriate information about the pandemic and the restrictions when the situation changes.

Teens are likely to seek answers from their peers, online and on social media. Help your teen get information from reliable and credible sources, such as government websites or the World Health Organization.

Talking about the pandemic and easing restrictions can help them understand and cope with what they hear.

3. Help teens follow local rules and restrictions

Be a good role model by following local regulations and restrictions yourself.

Show flexibility and problem-solving skills by showing your teenager how you adapt your daily life in response to changing regulations and restrictions.

4. Accept your teenager’s emotions

It is normal for adolescents to feel a wide range of strong emotions at different times during the pandemic – angry, scared, sad, frustrated, grief, worried, bored, confused, isolated, concerned.

You can help your teen cope by:

Ask and listen. Ask them how they are feeling and are doing, especially when the situation changes. When they open up, focus on listening – what they need most is empathy, compassion, and reassurance.

Show them how you do it. Teens look to their parents for what to do and how worried they should be. Try to set a good example by appearing as calm as possible and using healthy coping strategies yourself.

Be patient, maybe more than usual.

Be reassuring but realistic. Despite the negative news they may hear, teens need reassurance that their parents will be reassured that their families will go through the pandemic together, and that things will improve over time. But be careful not to make unrealistic promises.

Monitoring. Keep an eye on your teen’s stress level – look for changes in their behavior, health, and thoughts and feelings. Encourage them to do things that have helped them cope with stressful times in the past.

5. Help your teen determine what he can and cannot control

Encourage them to focus on what they can control. For example, young people can control their own COVID-safe behaviors (such as wearing masks and obeying local restrictions), but must accept that they cannot control the behavior of others.

Show them helpful ways to deal with uncertainty by showing them how you accept what is out of your control and focus your efforts on the things you can control.

Show your appreciation for their efforts to adapt to pandemic challenges, big or small.

6. Provide support as needed

Persistent uncertainties during the pandemic may affect teens months after local restrictions are eased.

So be prepared to provide ongoing emotional support as needed, rather than assuming that everything will be fine because life is “back to normal”.

Read more: Three in four people with a mental illness develop symptoms before the age of 25. We need to focus more on prevention

7. Establish routines

Routines help teens feel more organized, in control, safe, and less stressed – it can help protect their mental health.

Make sure your teen’s routine includes set times for homework, meals and snacks, physical activity, free time to have fun and relax, and time to socialize.

Regular sleep routines are also important. This means having a regular bedtime and waking time, and minimizing the use of electronic devices before bed. Review and adjust this routine with your teen as needed, such as when local restrictions change.

8. Adjust your expectations

With the changes and uncertainty caused by the pandemic, you may need to adjust some expectations of yourself and your teenager. Focus on emotional and physical well-being rather than perfection or high productivity.

Try to show self-compassion and forgiveness to yourself and your teenager if either of you isn’t meeting your expectations.

9. Look for silver liners

Try to give your teen a feeling of confidence that things will get better over time. Encourage any optimism or hope your teenager shows up.

Showing compassion, empathy, and kindness to others can also benefit your teenager. It can help them take a step back, give them a sense of accomplishment and pride, and provide opportunities for social interaction. Encourage your teen to take opportunities to help others when they can.

When to get help

Seek professional mental health support if your teen is having great difficulty adjusting to the challenges of the pandemic or reopening, or if you have mental health issues.

Some signs that you or your teen may need professional support include changes in mood or behavior that impact school, work or relationships, withdrawal from friends or family, distress intense and problems that don’t seem to get better over time.

Remember that by seeking support for yourself when needed, you are also setting a good example for your teenager.

For more helpful tips, see the Parenting Strategies website. Parents across Australia can also access the online evidence-based Partners in Parenting program for free.

Read more: Anorexia increased during pandemic, as teens felt the impact of COVID restrictions

If this article has raised any issues for you, or if you are concerned about someone you know, call Lifeline on 13 11 14.

This article was co-authored with University of Melbourne Emeritus Professor Anthony Jorm, who receives funding from the National Health and Medical Research Council. He is a member of the board of directors of Mental Health First Aid International, chair of the science advisory board of Prevention United, editor of Mental Health and Prevention and a member of the Association for Psychological Science.

Marie Yap receives funding from the Department of Health, the National Board of Health and Medical Research and Suicide Prevention Australia. She is a member of the Parenting and Family Research Alliance, Treasurer of the Alliance for the Prevention of Mental Disorders, Associate Editor of Mental Health and Prevention, and Co-Chair of the Scientific Committee and Member of the Steering Committee of Growing Minds Australia. .

Mairead Cardamone-Breen receives funding from the National Board of Health and Medical Research.

This article originally appeared on The Conversation.